I'm gonna pen it downi decided today
hopefully it'll help me to not get swayed by my feelings too easily
maybe someday i'll show it to you
maybe i'll day will never come
i guess its like you said
whats meant to be will be meant to be
But i'll try my very very hardest
work as hard as i can against whatever adversity we have
I guess its true that time flies when you're at your happiest
at least thats what it is for me
You know when you initially look at something pretty
Be ita person, an outfit or some work of art
At first glance you will just see how pretty it is
Its only after you really take time to notice it that you start seeing the flaws of things
Only after some time that you realise the little cracks and chips that cover the thing
Like a relationship,
in what my mummy calls the "honey-moon" stage
Everything is just so damned beautiful
You just see everything as being absolutely perfect
But with time you feel the stress of the wrongs
and the burderns of the disagreements
and the disappointment and hurt of whats missing
I look at myself and i cannot help but question
What do i offer in my relationship?
I don't see myself giving anything
yet there is so much that i want
And mostly its not that i dont want to give
I just can't
i guess one can say i dont really get the chance
I don't seem to help, i dont seem to make you feel better
i'm not good at advice i don't understand so much
And i'm someone that just can't seem to appreciate your train of thought
And yet i seem to be read like an opened book one most probably inked in flashy red
Mabe i won't get it, but i'm with you aren't i
Can't you see hat i would really love nothing more that to see the world from your perspective??
How much i desire to hear what is it that is making you smile or ponder?
Can you see how i feel from all this?
I'm really sufferring under it all you know
Its painful plain and simple.
i keep thinking, shouldn't a relationship be 2-wayed?
Will it work if its lob sided? What if it can't?
My side just seem to get heavier and heavier and i feel i might soon just fall right off
i wish i was someone you would want to introduce to your friends.
Someone whom you would like by your side when you're with others important to your life
Much like how i would love for you to be able to enjoy my friends company
I guess what i heard today really really struck me hard
Inadequate
yeah that would be an apt word to describe what i feel now..
Inadequate indeed