Come on lets smile
Have hope cause its a brand new day
Be glad you've been given this blessing to Live
Because to Live is the greatest strength of all
Lets live and make something beautiful ! ((:
I blog when life hurts too much
about me
all about me, baby
Take a step into my world and see.
Read for yourself my retrospection on life,
and words i have trouble speaking aloud
I like doing random spontaneous stuff
And i seriously find planning cumbersome
i really love my family
though sometimes it doesn't show
I hope to seek the great perhaps.
To live life, growing everyday.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
@ 6:19 PM
Be not ashamed of tears
for they were God given to express our emotions
Even Christ wept when He felt grieve
What more of us mere mortals
Cry when you have to
Feel the pain and the hurt
its is OK
The most important thing
Is how you deal with those emotions after that
It is really important to just leave it up to God
For its is only with His strength and wisdom
where you can find true comfort and peace
Be happy because you deserve to
Just be sure of what you are doing
I am letting you go
and slowly transforming that love to one of friendship
and also to one towards a brother in Christ
I hope that all I've said to you grants you more clarity
and have helped in some way
Thank you for everything
for your honesty
and for trying
You have truly given me two of the best years of my life
The happiness and content i felt were so real
And after all
I believe in the saying that it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all
At the very least i can say that i have loved you right from the start
until the very end
in the truest way i know how
I truly wish and pray for your happiness (:
Friday, October 23, 2009
@ 1:22 PM
The cruelty of man
the selfishness of an individual
It really strikes such a deep fear in my heart
It is so scary what we can do to one another
Why do we hurt the people we claim we love so much?
Why do we treat them in such a way?
How is it that we can do such cruel things just for some small moment of pleasure
the sinful nature in us can be so overwhelming
It is really so frightening
Thank God always for Christ
I know i can always trust in Him
He will never leave me or forsake me
Because my outlook on humanity
and the goodness that we COULD have
is so so so very bleak
Thursday, October 22, 2009
@ 11:29 AM
Contentment
why is it so hard to be content now a days
it seems like our culture and way of life
just teaches us to keep chasing after the next best thing
Be it material or relationships
Get the newest gadgets
the best cars
the most gorgeous bags
and get tired of the old one
when a relationship get too hard
give it up
let it go
and just find a new one
why is it never enough?
why can't we work harder with what we have?
trying to always sought after the next "better" thing.
why can't people just be satisfied with their numerous blessings
I need to make that choice
and make the effort
to be satisfied with all the great things God has given me
he has given me blessings aplenty
i should cherish them all
my friends, family, school even the country i live in is a great blessing
I need to see things from God's perspectives
to believe that He will and has provided me with all i need
at every single point of my life
He is my source and he has my life planned out for me beautifully
I will trust in him and in all things pray about it and leave it up to him
I have to be strong and keep my faith alive
Its not easy, in fact it is so hard
but its really time to just be happy and content with all that i have
I pray for the courage and strength i will need to get through this
32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?
Romans 8:32
P.S i guess you can say this post stems from my ODJ for today and also watching 'the black road'.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
@ 8:39 PM
Soooooooo
tonight is my first night ALONE in hall
its alright i guess
a bit lonely but not as bad as i had expected
Oh well, its time to grow up Tiffany
I miss Yuki a lot though
I am not sure what to do with my feelings
but to give them all up to God
Let His will play out in my life
i ask for your patience
And all i want is to be a part of it
So don't write me off just yet
I'll be your listening ear
and i'll be a good friend to you
i promise
I can do everything through Him who who gives me strength.
Phillipians 4 :13
@ 2:09 AM
I need forgiveness some patience a little kindness less selfishness i need your comfort
don't take everything away from me
Saturday, October 17, 2009
@ 3:11 PM
I am sorry for my mistakes and failures
Forgive me Father my wrong doings and sins
Even at the most lonely point help me realize that i am never alone
I will always have You
Help me remember your words
that holds true for all eternity
strengthen my Faith Lord and help me remember
Be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you"
Hebrews 13:5
And help me Father to be a worthy friend
to be a friend to all my brothers and sisters in a way that honors and pleases you
help me be a good friend to those who need Lord
and help me also Father find the friends i need to get through this
for even Paul needed and longed for companions as he faces his hard times
and i trust that Father you in all your wisdom know what i need
you will grant me the people i require
For it is as You had said
"A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity."
Proverbs 17:17
Teach me to be that friend
I am here for you to listen to your problems and troubles
No matter how weary you are i am here to help
i am sorry i didn't know better yesterday
if i remain the cause of your sufferings
just let me know
I'll leave if that makes it better for you
Even if i am just a friend
when you love someone
their interest should be before yours
and love endures all things
God bless and i will pray for his guidance upon both of us
Friday, October 16, 2009
@ 1:35 PM
Everything is falling apart
i am losing everyone i love and care about in someway or another
i don't understand why my mother is always mad at me
always scolding
i am scared even to say anything in her presence
and for that she still yells at me
saying that i have an attitude problem
i don't know why my sister say I've been sarcastic to her
i am just speaking the same way as i always do
she's been awfully aloof
and I've been so broken lately
i don't know how much more of her sorrows i can take
i know i am suppose to be there for her
and support her
but i really am dying
pushed right to my limit
i really don't know how much more i can bear
I've already lost the first boy i loved with all my heart and soul
And it just seems like i am failing him even as a friend
why is everything else being taken away too
and i am so worried for my daddy
his rheumatoid arthritis
it may get worst
i can only pray Lord that You will make it better
he isn't that young anymore
Please keep him safe and healthy
And throw in all of life's other little stress
i really am at a complete lost
Why can't i get anything right
its such a crucial period in school too
i am burning out
i really am at the edge and sooner or later i am just going to fall off
i feel my heart breaking every single second of every minute
i am so so so tired
and yet i still have to work so hard to be strong
I know Father that all this trials are there to test me
to strengthen my Faith
Lord i leave it all up to you
Please give me the strength and courage i need to go on
I need some comfort
I need someone, somebody , anything
because i don't think i can fall any further or break anymore
so help me Father
I know i can get through all this with You on my side
This song has been on repeat, i guess i am still waiting for my day to come
Someday we'll know-new radicals
90 miles outside Chicago
Cant stop driving I don't know why So many questions I need an answer Two years later You're still on my mind Whatever happened to Amelia Earhart Who holds the stars up in the sky Is true love once in a lifetime Did the captain of the titanic cry Chorus: Someday well know If love can move a mountain Someday well know Why the sky is blue Someday well know Why I wasn't meant for you Does anybody know the way to Atlantis Or what the wind says when she cries I'm speeding by the place where I met you For the 97th time tonight (chorus) Someday well know Why Samson loved Delilah One day Ill go Dancing on the moon Someday you'll know That I was the one for you I bought a ticket to the end of the rainbow I watched the stars crash in the sea If I could ask God just one question Why aren't you here with me? (chorus) Someday well know Why Samson loved Delilah One day Ill go Dancing on the moon Someday you'll know That I was the one for you
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
@ 4:35 PM
Its the 14th today
somehow a whole month had passed
and instead of celebrating the 2nd yr and 7th month into our relationship
I am mourning what we've lost
Everything seems to be falling apart
and troubles after troubles just keep getting heaped onto my shoulders
I am sorry i keep troubling you
but i really don't know who else to turn to
seems like there is no other person i can turn to
and really tell everything to
because well, you already know it all
there is no need for explanations
i cannot do this on my own
and the loneliness i feel is really getting to be so overwhelming
i don't know what i want
and i don't know what i need
i feel like everything is just slipping out of my grasp
i need you Father to help me
Give me the strength and courage i need to get through this
and help me strengthen my faith
for i am so weak
that i can feel it waning in such hard times
i am feeling so lost and confuse
I leave it all up to you
help me get through this
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”- Jeremiah 29:11
Maybe because its the 14th
or maybe its cause of everything that has been going on
i don't know
but all i really want to do right now is run into your arms and seek the comfort i need
and pray that tomorrow will never come
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
@ 10:52 PM
I remember the times we spent together on those drives We had a million questions all about our lives and when we got to New York everything felt right I wish you were here with me tonight
I remember the days we spent together were not enough and it used to feel like dreamin' except we always woke up Never thought not having you here now would hurt so much
Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up I need your loving hands to come and pick me up And every night I miss you I can just look up and know the stars are holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight
I remember the time you told me about when you were eight And all those things you said that night that just couldn't wait I remember the car you were last seen in and the games we would play All the times we spilled our coffees and stayed out way too late I remember the time you sat and told me about your Jesus and how not to look back even if no one believes us When it hurt so bad sometimes not having you here...
I sing, "Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up I need your loving hands to come and pick me up And every night I miss you I can just look up and know the stars are holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight"
I sing, "Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up I need your loving hands to come and pick me up And every night I miss you I can just look up and know the stars are holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight"
Tonight by FM static
@ 1:07 AM
Cleaned my hostel today!
It was really quite tiring
Lucky manage to get Olive's and Shu Hui's HELP
Thank you many many !
Haha so i will be moving in soon
kinda scared and nervous actually
I've never been much of the independent type
and I've never really tried living alone
But i guess i just felt like it was time for a change
I prayed really hard and thought a lot
and it seems that God was guiding me down this route
So let us hope that it will help me grow as a person
for the better
So be prepared people !
buy me residence warming presents to decorate my room K!
HAHA and feel free to come stay with me
Your company will be very much appreciated
To be honest i missed you today (:
And as usual i just embrace the feeling
God bless and i hope all was good for you today
Sunday, October 11, 2009
@ 7:20 PM
Are you experiencing suffering? Don't fight against it as one who has no hope. Don't believe the lies of false teachers who wrongly say, "You simply need more faith to overcome your struggles."
Instead, embrace your suffering as a gift from God- being used to perfect you and your faith in Him.
A quote from a Christian blog: ymiblogging (:
Indeed I seem to be weighed down with the pressure of many things recently
And sometimes many things just pile up and you feel like you cannot bear anymore
I have to embrace the trials
and keep in mind for always that if God presented me this hard times
He has given me all that i need to get through it
And i trust that this will help me grow as a person
and grow also spiritually
to learn to trust, hope, keep faith and love Him even more
as He loves me.
And thank you to my close special friend :)
for listening and for reminding me of what i have forgotten in my struggle to get through the hard times
i will keep all you've said close to my heart
Saturday, October 10, 2009
@ 1:29 PM
PHILIPPIANS 4:6-7
6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
It was 40 years ago or more that I observed a friend of mine showing great affection for someone I considered unworthy of love. I thought my friend was being taken in, and I was afraid he would be disillusioned and saddened in the end.
When I expressed my concern, he replied, “When I stand before my Lord, I hope He’ll say of me that I've loved too many, rather than too few.” I've never forgotten his words.
Paul insists that “[love] believes all things” (1 Cor. 13:7). Love “believes” in people. It can see the potential in them. It believes that God can take the most unattractive and unworthy individual and turn that person into a masterpiece of beauty and grace. If love errs, it must err in the way of trustfulness and hopefulness.
Certainly, we must be aware of danger when we see it coming, and become “as wise as serpents” (Matt. 10:16). Tough love may be the best response to irresponsible and foolish people, but we can be too guarded, too wary and distrustful.
It doesn't do us any real harm to be hoodwinked and defrauded (Matt. 5:38-48). It’s better to believe in someone and have your heart broken than to have no heart at all. British poet Alfred Tennyson wrote, “ ’Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” I agree. — David H.
You might say i am foolish and silly
or just being fake and what not
But i would really love to have loved too many than to have loved too few
And i would rather see the best in people and put their interest before mine
Commit to Love and seek the best of others
Than guard my heart and be so wary so as to always protect myself
Because despite the pain that love brings
the joy and experiences when you truly love in a Godly way
is so much more rewarding
May i please and glorify my Lord in the Love that i give (:
Thursday, October 08, 2009
@ 1:38 PM
So i had my "Gauge" meeting with Jun Wei yesterday
HAHA it was really errrrmm well raw?
I guess you can say we were both testing the waters
But i was fun (:
and rather relaxing
But its great that i manage to clarify everything
that i got the answers i sought
whether it makes me feel better?
I don't know
But i definitely feel less lost
And its nice to know what Jun Wei's honest thoughts and feelings are
so i spent the night praying and thinking
and immersing myself in God's words
And i pretty much decided the same thing
I'll leave it all up to God
I'll put all my faith in His wisdom and love
And trust in His plans for me
And in the mean time,
I'll do my very best to stay strong
And do my best to glorify and honor God in all that i do
I would love the people around me the way He has wanted love to be
And someday it'll be like you said (:
We could spent a day together and everything will end on a happy note
Thank You for everything Jun Wei
Wednesday, October 07, 2009
@ 12:32 AM
So much has been happening recently
I've lost so much and had to bear so much pain
And yet in the process I've gained much
I've made some choice
but i don't know if its good or bad
My mind has just been in a whirl
I just went with my instincts
I pray that it is God working in me
Because i really don't possess the logic i need
to do this on my own
God help me get through this
Let it all play out according to your plans
i leave it up to your will Father
Please, i can't do this on my own
Sunday, October 04, 2009
@ 12:17 AM
Keep faith alive
It is in times like this
filled with doubt and fear
that i can learn and grow
Have faith in my God
Friday, October 02, 2009
@ 12:31 AM
I wish to live a life that glorifies your name Father Grand me the wisdom and guidance to lead my life in a way that honors and pleases you Lend me strength Lord to get through the hard times and learn to trust in You That my life and future has been set in stone by You All things will be ok because you are the Lord over my life.
Thursday, October 01, 2009
@ 4:13 AM
I spilled soup on my lap top
The whole thing died and took my essay that is due the next day with it