What is going on?
why is it that so much seem to change in barely a month
it hurts so much to keep crying
i miss you so damn much .
why are you so cold towards me
why why why
what am i suppose to do

I've been really heart broken recently ..
feeling sad fo a number of reasons
finally i had a talk with my mum and she helped me accept that all relzationships have their ups and downs
so i am really trying my hardest to make him happy and deal with whatever sadness i feel alone..
And of course trying to keep my insecurities at bay.

but i guess ultimately the things i miss most are all the small little things
the messages in the morning..
and of cause i miss all the "dears" and "i miss you"
i cant even remember when is the last time he told me that
and yet i find that i haven't changed much ..
i still miss him so much and i find it so hard to say
because i am so afraid of being too overwhelming
i wish i knew what i could do
how to be better
because i dont want whatever spark and feelings we have to go away
i really wish i knew what to do
i really hope that he knows how much he mean to me

and if i could i just wished that he'll let me know that i still mean something to him
i'll just keep waiting .. cause i really don't know what else i can do