just remember to smile

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hello

welcome to silv3r17.blogspot.com

Come on lets smile
Have hope cause its a brand new day
Be glad you've been given this blessing to Live
Because to Live is the greatest strength of all
Lets live and make something beautiful ! ((:

I blog when life hurts too much

about me

all about me, baby

Take a step into my world and see.
Read for yourself my retrospection on life,
and words i have trouble speaking aloud

I like doing random spontaneous stuff
And i seriously find planning cumbersome
i really love my family
though sometimes it doesn't show

I hope to seek the great perhaps.
To live life, growing everyday.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

@ 11:20 PM

I have been feeling so confused

feels like i kinda am just spinning round and a round

in this vicious cycle, so dizzy

i can't see straight, just plain lost

Sunday, May 23, 2010

@ 9:43 PM

I am so super confuse

I want to grab all my emotions

and just lock them in a damn box

so everything can finally stop hurting so much

i wish i had all the strength in the world

so i can endure this without being so much trouble

so that i could smile for you no matter how much i hurt

I wish i could stop feeling so scared you're gonna leave

feeling so in love with you it suffocates me

Feeling so under appreciated and taken for granted

feeling like i was invisible and just a habit

feeling like every step i force myself to take away from you hurt me like nothing else ever did

i want it all to just stop and pause for a while

most of all i wish i knew what God's will for me is

so i can just focus and give my all to doing it

and not feel so stuck in this not here not there

status-less, sinful excuse of a relationship

that i am so afraid of losing

i really don't understand

is it so hard to be with me?

why are we like this

i just want to sleep and not wake up

Friday, May 21, 2010

@ 12:12 AM

Sigh, why are you so aloof and cool towards me

it makes our conversations seem like a formality

SAD

Thursday, May 20, 2010

@ 12:24 AM

Although i love my work

it has really been very very draining

i feel exhausted most of the time

and its getting harder and harder to keep being strong

so for this period i am sorry

i apologize first if i break or seem difficult

i know its no excuse

but i hope you can understand i am trying very hard

just alot to deal with now

Miss you ):

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

@ 11:11 PM

it was a trying day

Really need to thank God for getting me through

Now to sort out my heart

GOTTA PRESS ON !!

I can do this with You on my side.

@ 1:30 AM

my own wishful thinking

I am sorry

Sunday, May 16, 2010

@ 9:22 PM

I know its ungrateful and wrong

But sometimes i wish i had gone deeper

and succeeded.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

@ 7:37 PM

I really hate that disappointment i feel

when you forgot something you said

it makes me feel cheap

and so insignificant and empty

and to pile on the misery

i feel stupid for hoping you'll remember

I don't care that it rained

That walk was the best thing that happened

and the happiest memory i collected all week

@ 4:27 AM

I should be happy right?

Why do i feel so sad?

Why does it feel like there is this huge gapping hole in my heart?

I feel so so lost and empty

It feels like nothing has change

and its tiring having to feel so bad,

so awful

and so apologetic

when all i did was love you ):

I feel like i'm dying every step of the way

I feel so exhausted to have to try so hard to push you away

Why is it so hard to let go? why must it be what you ask of me?

Friday, May 14, 2010

@ 2:31 AM

Did you know Quinn loves bacons too !

Woo and she got sad cause 'puck's' mother refuses to let her eat bacon

SO CUTE

Glee makes me happy at the end of a long tired day

Gives me optimism too (:

Hello dear boy, sorry for being weak today

BUT

Happy 14th to you

can't believe it has been 8 months

I guess time flies when you are in pain too

Saturday, May 08, 2010

@ 5:20 AM

I love hugs from behind ((((:

And i had one just yesterday

HAPPY MOMENT

Friday, May 07, 2010

@ 2:48 AM

Had a pretty good day !

Watch Ip Man 2 with jun wei

it was super nice ..

Followed by GLEE at home

and some awesome supper with Charlene and Nic

overall a rather enjoyable day(:

I was thinking about being nice today

When i ask the people around me

friends and family

i get general consensus that i kinda am a nice person

but i realize

sometimes i really do expect people to be nice to me too

not like huge ass things

but small little things

and when they aren't

i kinda don't feel like being nice to them anymore

i guess i ain't as nice as i would like to be

Really gotta work on that

Anyway on a happier note

TANNY WONG SEE MUN SAID THE NICEST THING

she say Quinn Fabray reminds her of me

I am so happy

i could float

((((((((((((((((((((((((((:

Wednesday, May 05, 2010

@ 3:53 AM

The very first walk i had with him was bare-footed too

Love this PIC ((:

But yes that is the past, oh well

I am still trying to let go OK, quit bugging me !

Anyway exams are over

Finally i can take a breather

Had and awesome time Olive Emma Imran and Jay

My first time at minds cafe

First time playing Taboo also

HAHAHAHAHAHA

I know, I IS MOUNTAIN TORTOISE

Can't wait have some post-exams crazy fun

YOU MAY ALL START ASKING ME OUT ((((((((((:

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

@ 12:15 AM

FREEDOM REAL SOON

I CAN TASTE IT

Last paper tomorrow

Thank you to the Lord for getting me through !

Every paper was a blessing (:

Sad note: I CANNOT FIND MY HOSTEL KEYS

where oh where are my room keys

what should i do?

And to top it off two leeches, namely

Tanny and Lizard are attempting to live off me

Gotta find a way to ward of their finger gym machine/ antenna

HAHAHA

Sunday, May 02, 2010

@ 10:52 PM

NOM NOM NOM

Lets go eat a burger together soon

Yay (: