I am so super confuse
I want to grab all my emotions
and just lock them in a damn box
so everything can finally stop hurting so much
i wish i had all the strength in the world
so i can endure this without being so much trouble
so that i could smile for you no matter how much i hurt
I wish i could stop feeling so scared you're gonna leave
feeling so in love with you it suffocates me
Feeling so under appreciated and taken for granted
feeling like i was invisible and just a habit
feeling like every step i force myself to take away from you hurt me like nothing else ever did
i want it all to just stop and pause for a while
most of all i wish i knew what God's will for me is
so i can just focus and give my all to doing it
and not feel so stuck in this not here not there
status-less, sinful excuse of a relationship
that i am so afraid of losing
i really don't understand
is it so hard to be with me?
why are we like this
i just want to sleep and not wake up
